My EYES! Oh AAARRGGH I CAN STILL SEE IT

OK - full disclosure: I have a guilty pleasure. Well, several actually, but this post isn't about monkeys. I'm a geek, and I relax by geeking out and watching mindless sci-fi movies. If it has robots, spaceships, lasers, monkeys, hot chicks in boots, and/or dragons - that's my way of breathing deep and saying "ooohhhhhmmmm". So after a trying week, I just tried relaxing by watching Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.

I couldn't do it. Even though things were blowing up and Megan Fox was never assigned pants by the wardrobe department, by 23 minutes in, I wanted to tear out my eyes with my own teeth. I don't know how a movie could suck this much while spending so much money, but then again I didn't watch the royal wedding today.

Anyhow - in summation: given a choice between watching this movie or having to live for a week inside Carrot-top's mouth , the choice is clear. Don't. Waste. Your. Time.